Last night I finally cried. I cried because of everything I’ve been seeing and reading lately. My fiancee  and I tried our best to stay positive. But the weight is unbearable 💔
After waking up to horrible news about two black men killed within two days, my heart ached.

It aches for them.

It aches for their families.

It aches because racism is real. And alive.

It aches because no matter how many videos, no matter how many black lives are murdered. Nothing. Nothing is done.

Black lives  killed and bad cops who were sworn in to protect their communities have no repercussions. It is hard to see everything. It is unbelievably hard looking at my fiancee whom is watching videos of men who look like him are dying in the streets. Dying from police brutality. Dying for no reason.

They do have the power and authority to kill. To kill innocent black lives.  These deaths of unarmed black men at the hands of police have become an all-too familiar narrative in our public life.

Last night… I finally cried.

I am afraid. I am a woman of color, a brown woman who will have be marrying a black man. These black and brown bodies that are feared and hated by white America. I am afraid because will my future black/brown children be living in a world like this? I am afraid because no one should explain to their children to “comply” to police. No one should be afraid of the police. Yet, is it normal for me or anybody else to feel on edge when we do see cops? We should feel safe, but all we see is police brutality toward those who look like the love of my life and that I cannot understand. Will not understand.

So what does that mean for us? For black lives? For brown lives?

“The culture of the United States has been built on a racial binary designed to exclude and oppress the descendants of Africans brought into this country against their own will. Anti-blackness is not the occupation of hateful individuals, rather it is embedded within the very notion of race in the US, and reflected in all of its institutions. As Latinos- which is, itself a designation of ethnicity, not race-we often find ourselves struggling to stake  out a place within this rigid racial landscape, while dealing with our own internalized biases and societal pressures to assimilate into whiteness”.

I stand by black bodies. I stand by brown bodies. I stand by woke people. I stand by those who know they are privileged in this white world and do not use it in a negative way. Those who DO NOT push others down simply because of SKIN COLOR. I stand by BLM.